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91 Miracles are seen in light.

MT: I know the possibilities, JC. I know what could be, if only . . .
JC: You know nothing, dear sister, beloved, beautiful and whole. You know nothing.
MT: You are saying I have no way of knowing what could be, because that is beyond my imagining.
JC: To lament being short of a state that is only a projection of the past, that is futile. The mind is doing nothing while engaging in this. Let go of past and future. Come wholly empty-handed unto your God.
MT: I see that I can't be present while lamenting not being present.
JC: That would be one way to hide the light from you. There are many, and all equally futile.

92 Miracles are seen in light, and light and strength are one.

JC: You bring light today to those you meet. Selfish happiness does not exist.
MT: Sometimes I feel like a burned-out bulb, and I fight that feeling. But fighting it doesn't help.
JC: Know that the truth needs no defense. Meet the world totally without defenses and you will see how needless and futile they are.
MT: It was good to meditate this morning, JC. I got to that place where nothing needs to happen, where I can meditate forever. Thanks for the useful commentary on the lesson. I've been missing the point for a while, wandering in the wilderness so to speak.
JC: Wander no more. The Father waits with a banquet set for you in your House that you never left.

93 Light and joy and peace abide in me.

MT: One phrase stuck out for me, JC--"we question this . . . from a very different reference point." To change my reference point, that makes total sense. My old reference point was that of a bug groping about in the dust. I breathed dust and called it perfume. At any time a cosmic shoe might squash me, and I would fully deserve to be flattened out. I accepted what other bugs said as gospel, secretly hating them and their pronouncements and hating myself for being a hypocrite. I saw no way out. "Life is a bitch, and then you die."
JC: Enough of those imaginings. Your sinlessness is guaranteed by God. What does God say about you?
MT: In me the Father is well pleased. I am the Holy Son of God, always was, always will be. Nothing I say or do or think can change my eternal holiness.

94 I am as God created me.

MT: In my long adaptation to the world of flesh and bone, time/space, relationships, money, religion, sin and guilt, I glued together a self to fit, or seemingly fit. What if I had known the truth of who I AM all along!
JC: "What-ifs" do not help. Do not lament the darkness. The words of this lesson represent Awakening. Turn on the light, and leave all thought behind, every mad idea of who you were or should be and could or could not do. A new day dawns, and in the freshness of the new you will find the Self you never lost.
MT: I am as God created me. Thank you for the truth of these words.

95 I am one Self, united with my Creator.

MT: Let me paraphrase the lesson. I see myself as a ridiculous parody on God's creation; weak, less-than, a victim of my past, poor, miserable and prey to every malady known to man. Such is my version of myself; a self divided into many warring parts, separate from God, and tenuously held together by its erratic and capricious maker, to which I pray. It does not hear my prayers, for it is deaf. It does not see the oneness in me, for it is blind. It does not understand I am the Son of God, for it is senseless and understands nothing.

I have seen the extent of my lack of mental discipline, and of my need for mind training. . . . Regularity . . . is advantageous for those whose motivation is inconsistent, and who remain heavily defended against learning. That's me! Ouch!

JC: And if you truly were one Self, united with your Creator?

MT: I would probably be out hiking in the cool of dawn, breathing deeply of air that night renewed and refreshed. I would smile to the few I meet and say "Hi!" I would be in intimacy with grasses and reeds, sense their gentle openness to this visitor. I would softly call to the rabbit scurrying into the sagebrush: "do not fear, I wish you no harm." I would fully, completely enjoy this day that is God's gift to me.

JC: Need I say more?

96 Salvation comes from my one Self.

JC: Problems that have no meaning cannot be resolved within the framework they are set. You must look for the answer where it is, not where it is not.
MT: Surrender, then, has a deeper meaning: to let go of the need to find an answer, and also to let go of the question itself. When I consider this, my mind seems to go into space.
JC: Welcome to the Light. Go for the Light.
MT: Yet it is always easier for me to retreat than to connect. Connecting with others has always been an effort.
JC: The effort must go, this much is true. When you let go of effort, connection becomes a joy. It is a return to your natural state. When you are connected with your one Self, the easy joy of friendship is a given. It does not need to be added by trying harder. You know this with your cat, you know this with your grandchildren. You can know this with strangers.
MT: What surprises these lessons contain!

97 I am Spirit.

How am I to be absolved from madness? By knowing I am Spirit.

I am Spirit, lovingly endowed with the Father's love and peace and joy.

God's promise: the Holy Spirit will be glad to take from my hands five minutes out of every hour of this day, to be bestowed on an aching world in which pain and misery, cruelty and lack seem to reign.

My gift of a few minutes will be multiplied a thousand, ten thousand times and more. My willingness to let my mind be changed will touch myriad souls in far-away places. My commitment fans out in waves, a pebble tossed on a still lake, its ripples touching distant shores the pebble knows not. This, not from my puny, isolated, shabby made-up self, but because we are One.

98 I will accept my part in God's plan for salvation.

MT: I accept me this morning: sleepy and unfocussed and reluctant. I sat here to post, but I would rather be in the kitchen, making up an omelet and brewing hot coffee. I am doing this out of obligation, JC. No missionary zeal here. Right at the moment, I've lost sight of my own best interests in studying the Lessons and posting my blogs.
JC: This is Easter, the day you celebrate forgiveness. Not that you should overlook forgiveness the other 364 days!
MT: Shiny eggs laid by cute rabbits (where did that come from? Why do we teach children ridiculous errors in biology?), lilies, colors (thank God for my generous climbing roses!), sunshine, my aliveness that can appreciate the gifts of God.
JC: Especially your aliveness that goes out in gratitude.
MT: Especially my aliveness that can say thank you God, I'm alive. You haven't left me, nor could you. You bathe every cell of my body with Life. That I have to give, and it is enough.

99 Salvation is my only function here.

Whose salvation? Mine, but since we are One, everybody's. An old fear for me was this: salvation required me to stand in the street corner to preach to other sinners, or knock on doors like a JW, or convert my classmates. But if I broadcast the news that everybody was a sinner and needed to accept Jesus as savior, wouldn't they rightly want to stone me? How could I ever carry out an assignment with no possible completion?

So here's my gratitude for today: salvation asks nothing. It has no requirements. It is freely given by God, Who sees no need for it. Salvation does not make me responsible for anyone else, nor am I to earn my place in Heaven by good deeds. I cannot be saved, because I was never condemned and there is nothing to be saved from. I truly need do nothing. What wondrous Easter gift, salvation!

100 My part is essential to God's plan for salvation.

MT: Who? Me? I only have life to be lived.
JC: And living your life (rather than dying by dropperfuls) is part of the Plan. What can you bring joy TO, today?
MT: Guess you're saying I'm not the effect of what is around me.
JC: You are an effect of God. As such, you are Cause of the world around you.
MT: That is SO hard to see! My tribal mindset says I am a little canoe tossed around by the storm. Nothing I can do about it but cower, and wait, and wait. Perhaps tomorrow the sun will shine. Or next day, next week . . .
JC: You bring the light. You are the sun. Give of your light, and you shall receive the light.

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